How to Stay on Top When We’re There
Discover why staying successful can feel just as challenging as becoming successful. Learn how to cherish and sustain your peak moments.
Hi There!
Today’s topic, "How to Stay on Top When We’re There," is close to my heart because of the complex thoughts I've wrestled with around my personal success story.
Building the setting
Something good happens—maybe at work, in your relationships, or with your finances. And then, a voice inside whispers:
"This is too good to be true. What will go wrong next?"
- A common conversation/fear for many of us.
Scenarios
Everything is going wrong: You're in full victim mode, seeing everything negatively. This mindset, however, sets the stage for growth.
Life is "good enough": Some areas, like relationships or finances, aren't fulfilling, even if they're not terrible.
Everything is just right: Yet, you can't shake the feeling that it won't last.
Where does it come from?
We’ve developed a deep-rooted belief that good fortune comes at a cost and that maintaining success requires a form of payback to avoid negative consequences.
Historical and psychological perspective
Book of Genesis: Abraham’s test of faith required a great sacrifice.
Greek Myth of Icarus: A warning against overreaching.
Legend of King Midas: A tale of how great fortune can lead to ruin.
Concept of Karma: Suggests our actions determine our future, balancing our fortunes.
Negativity Bias: We're wired to focus more on the negative than the positive.
(Similar to confirmation bias from our last newsletter)
But what do you do when everything is going right?
Building a habit of reframing self-sabotaging thoughts is crucial. Instead of arguing with that internal voice predicting doom, learn to laugh it off—a challenging but essential skill.
Here are some daily practices to support your habits
Gratitude: Recognize your role in the good happening in your life.
Acceptance: It’s normal to have self-doubting thoughts, acknowledging them reduces their power.
Appreciation: Understand that these thoughts are not defining, they serve a purpose until you decide they don't.
Cementing our success
When life is going well, it’s the perfect time to focus on the smaller, perhaps overlooked aspects of life. Use this opportunity to refine and enhance areas that are often neglected.
Identifying your trends
Answer these questions as a self-assessment:
What recent successes have you experienced, and how did they make you feel?
Do you notice a pattern of self-doubt or fear following positive events?
What small, often overlooked aspects of your life could benefit from your attention right now?
How do you practice gratitude, and how can you deepen this practice?
Keep Growing,
Your coach and friend,
Carlos
BONUS:
Personal Reflection
Just after the birth of my daughter, in a moment that should have been purely joyful, a flood of worries came to me.
"Life is too good right now: a loving partner, a healthy daughter, my coaching business is picking up, love writing my newsletter, healthiest I've been since college, stable in all areas of life. But what would happen if my clients don't reach their goals, if something happens to my baby, or if I get in a car crash?"
My focus shifted to all the things that "could" go wrong, overshadowing my ability to appreciate the great things happening right now.
Hit Reply!
When everything is going right, when we are on top, to stay longer there we choose to focus on smaller details.
I chose to focus on becoming more nurturing in my relationships at home and at work. What will you choose to focus on?
Hit Forward!
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Thank you and see you Tuesday!
